Ramen (Japanese Noodle Soup)

Every person who is broke knows what instant ramen is, how to cook it, and when to eat it. I'm making a fancier version for that special occasion you have more than a dollar in your pocket or for when you're tired of eating that 35 cent a pack, three-for-a-dollar, Top Ramen which is probably all the time. I always think about  the immoral lyrics of Filthy Frank when ever I cook ramen, here they are: "We got chicken and beef to boost the manhood; Anybody want a piece of me will have to get this ramen first; Start with the shrimp and then the fire; If you're fully blazed then this shit'll get you higher; Thirty-five cents a pack, three for a dollar; Unbelievable pricing that's the future of a blue collar worker; And I'm talkin' bout ramen; This shit'll fill you up when you're feeling like an African" This song perfectly symbolizes what instant ramen is and how it has helped our young professional progress in society. I am using shrimp in my recipe, but it can be done using almost any cooked protein.

Pad Thai

Pad Thai is a symbol of Thai nationalism. After World War 2, one of the prime-ministers put all of Thailand's resources into creating a non-wheat based noodle since the latter were proof of dependence on China. God damn Western spies. Pad Thai can be made with either shrimp, chicken, beef, or a combination of all three. But not pork since pork was also proof of dependence on China. I decided to go with shrimp, which I later regretted. So it turns out that these things are like 20 dollars a pound at the store. Lie down, try not to cry, cry a lot. You can make this dish with a prepared Pad Thai sauce or you can make one right at home using palm sugar, tarmarind paste, radish preserve, fish oil, water, and chili paste. I prefer buying it from the store because it is cheaper than buying all the separate ingredients.

Tom Yum Goong (Creamy spicy Thai soup)

Tom Yum Goong is a very famous Thai soup. It is so famous that the Asia Financial Crisis of 1997 is also called the Tom Yum Goong Financial Crisis in Thailand. It all began when the Thai Baht couldn't keep matching with the US Dollar and South East Asia plummeted into financial darkness, kind of similar to my bank account. What a wonderful piece of history. Back to the food, Thai restaurants have a very strange chili rating system, there was a Thai place in New Orleans called Sukhothai which has a spicy rating of 1, 3, 5, and 20. Now I'm an adventurous person and like to take on challenges so I went for the 20. It was so spicy that I felt it in my mouth all the way down to my anus the next morning. My roommate was so worried when I was screaming on the toilet all night long. You can recreate that experience by making this dish at home using extra hot roasted red chili paste.